18 Comments

Yes! Social media detox is a temporary solution to a permanent problem that we, the users of social media, cannot fix. I just walked away too, and am not going back. The biggest challenge for me, and it's probably true for lots of people, is that even IRL creative communities (I'm an artist) connect and operate primarily on socials and want artists to have a social media presence to help promote their organizations. And a lot of people exclusively connect online and don't have an IRL community to fill the void. So when they detox, they get lonely and bored, because they're not taking the time or don't know how to find people IRL. We need to relearn those skills. Those of us who are off socials have an opportunity to illuminate that path by sharing our experiences. Thank you for talking about it!

Expand full comment

Hey Jen! Thanks for sharing, you bring up a major struggle, its a fact that a lot of communities exist online, I have one on Mighty Networks instead of social, but its a struggle for people who want to be part of communities that are only on social media or in person maybe nowhere near you. OR like you said, we need to relearn the IRL people skills! AMEN! Thanks for sharing your thoughts it's always so fun to connect with others who are offline. Hope you're having a great day! xx

Expand full comment

It's the same as the "detoxes" we tell people that are available from work. To escape work for a bit because you are burnt out and disengaged, only to return to the same system with all of the context and conditions that led to the burn out and disengagement still fully in place.

It's convenient that the "detox" messaging is rooted in blaming the individual vs. looking at the underlying paradigm and model for the system.

If we look across many of the human-made systems, we will see the same basic patterns.

If we are to move on from the poor patterns, it will take a disciplined and principled approach to understanding change and transformation at the paradigm and model levers of a system.

Expand full comment

Love this perspective Joe! And I think you're absolutely right.

Expand full comment

Great read Carly. The stat that strikes me the most is the 77% of people who'd consider doing an indefinite social media detox if the needs/wants could be fulfilled in different ways. Looking forward to reading more from you!

Expand full comment

Glad you enjoyed it Matilda! Isn't that stat so eye opening? Thanks for the kind words!

Expand full comment

Social Media ... holiday? Yeah, that seems more appropriate to me. My personal issue with social media is the difficulty of escape. I deleted Facebook the year that Trump was elected the first time because I was tired of seeing all of my friends fighting about politics. I only recently (and ironically I suppose) downloaded it again months before he was reelected. I kept away for so many years so it was more of a change of direction than a break for me. I deleted Instagram for two years after selling my account after being completely burned out from running it and the accompanying website -that was a wonderful time. I had only Pinterest to answer to ... which is pretty innocuous in comparison.

I mentioned it's inescapable. Well, Apple figured out a long time ago that if you purchased music through Apple Music you would be more likely to stick around due to those purchases. This is how Instagram trapped me. Thousands of photos from many years of posting keeps me from deleting my account and becoming truly free ... ish.

Even if I delete my Instagram and Facebook apps, and the accounts attached to them, I can still visit the platforms* from Google. That means if I click on an image on someone's website I'm likely to be redirected to either platform -which exposes me to that landscape yet again. It's a metaphorical, reformed alcoholic dining on chicken wings and a club soda while seated at a bar on a Saturday night.

I want to be done with it. I have been done with it. I am done with it, but how do I escape it for good?

*Twitter, X, whatever, has kept me from ever going back by requiring a password to enter. Thank you Elon for that.

Expand full comment

I want to break the cycle so badly. Just deactivated my Instagram account. I will be keeping FB because I love FB groups and marketplace.

Loved this read!

Expand full comment

I have been off social media for almost two years now and Ive missed out on...nothing! Everyone I care about knows I'm not on the apps and so they contact me via Whatsapp. My only struggle is that I am an artist and many people make it seem like I need to be on Instagram to promote my work...but I refuse to believe that. I am hopeful that there are other ways to make it as an artist without dealing with the life-sucking attributes of social media.

Expand full comment

Funny this article showed up just as I was thinking about needing a social media detox. Great article!

Expand full comment

I’m curious—how do those of you who don’t use social media save and organize your photo and video memories? My camera roll has over 40k photos/videos, and I’ve always used social media to share and preserve the ones I love most. For those who don’t rely on social platforms, what practical methods do you use to keep your favorite memories accessible and meaningful?

Expand full comment

Wow! True! I wrote a post last month about wanting to break up with my phone. I went on a two week break and the past few days, I'm back to square one even after so many ah-ha moments during my break and reflections. Thanks for this.

https://heatherbereal.substack.com/p/i-want-to-break-up-with-my-phone?r=4fhqvh

Expand full comment

Loved reading this!

I left facebook and instagram 4-5 months ago and don’t miss it one bit. There is so much more time now to be intentional and man—the mental clarity that comes back was worth leaving.

Expand full comment

I agree with evt you wrote !

As a young artist, I feel like it is very difficult to build my business/art network without social media.

People want you to have online portofolio + insta account + linked in... Sometimes the easisest way to get an interview with someone you are interested to work with is through insta or linked in DM.

I don't have this issue with young artist of my generation tho, because we feel the same urge to step back from online life.

What do you think ?

Expand full comment

I got hacked on my Meta accounts and never returned to Fb after that. I do have a tiny presence on Insta just to keep contact with friends. For the rest I focus on Substack. Writing out in thin air and follow somw writers and commentators in notes. It is relaxing 😃

Expand full comment

Fantastic article, Carly!

I’ve done that “detox” myself, and yes… I went back, despite how amazing I felt *without* social media.

I fell for the lie that I “need it” for my online business. And, tbh, I’m still not entirely convinced that I don’t.

But I’m getting there. Thanks, in large part, to people like you (and @AstridBracke ) who give me hope that it’s possible to do without it!

Expand full comment
Comment deleted
Nov 2
Comment deleted
Expand full comment

I thought about asking if Substack is considered social media? Over the past 7 years of having these conversations, never once has anyone brought up Substack. I actually just heard of it for the first time about 6 months ago! I see how some of the features could feel that way, but I see it as a writing platform. Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Happy to have you here Pavel!

Expand full comment
Comment deleted
Nov 1
Comment deleted
Expand full comment

TINA! Hey! Happy you're here in my little corner, it' always a pleasure connecting with and hearing from you. Thanks for being here and reading, I hope you find it valuable here! xx

Expand full comment